Today was one of those days where I do what I need to to just get through it. I gave myself some time to cry and feel everything that comes along with being depressed and anxious, then I took Ativan, which is my prescribed “emergency pill.” It works fast and it helps me feel better for long enough to get done what I need to.
Today, I cried for hours. I’m scared of everything not working. I’m terrified of feeling this way forever. I almost prayed to feel better, and I don’t even believe in any god. I layed on the floor begging (only to myself) for someone to help me.
But, I also had a therapy appointment, and my therapist is wonderful and understanding and she recommended I move my medication management appointment up to this week so I can hopefully get some relief. I don’t know what medication I will be put on next. My therapist recommended I mention Abilify and Seroquel, so we’ll see what comes next. Thankfully, that appointment is only two days away.